Rhythm of the Rain

[venus ollivander]

Rain, It had an odd effect on life in the castle. The students would retreat to the castle, driven from the grounds. This meant the libraries were full, it meant that even the dungeons were more abuzz. The Slytherin common room had been uncomfortably crowded and Venus, honestly wasn't feeling it. She emerged from the underwater room, watching the way the rain beat against the castle walls as as she began to stalk through the halls. Was she wandering? Did she have some purpose. Even Venus couldn't say.

Venus Ollivander was a queen bee in every sense of the word. She had a posse of girls, Slytherins and Gryffindors mostly, who were hangers on. Today though she had decided she was going to take some time for herself. She didn't have a strong desire to be around them. today. The fiery redhead had a distinctly moody side, and being on top of the world was tiring sometimes. Particularly on rainy days like this. The rain was calming and peaceful for Venus and she wanted to enjoy it alone. She was on her way to the library to find somewhere quiet to sit and to read. What a way to spend a rainy day, away from people who would serve to irritate her.

She rounded the corer and saw the familiar, and very beautiful figure of Josie Williams moving ahead of her headed in the same direction. Venus was frustrated by the girl's presence. Not that Josie had done anything wrong aside from existing, beautifully, around a girl who had no idea how to react to that. She knew what she wanted but she didn't know how to get it, or how to be accepted for the gay woman she was. She froze for a moment, knowing in the end that she would make the same decision she had made before. Venus resolved this inner turmoil in a way she was sure was wrong, but that she saw no alternative to. Venus raised her and and declared "Diffindo" Slashing the straps of the pretty blonde Ravenclaw's backpack and sending it tumbling from her back, its contents spilling out.

Venus merely smirked a challenge to Josie. Daring her to do something about it. The reason for this, she would never admit was a craving for interaction with the other woman. Simply to watch her work.  To see her life unfold. It was cruel, certainly but Venus' family had always been morbidly fascinated with things that would cause others discomfort. So casual bullying wasn't much of a stretch, even if her father wouldn't have approved.

[josie williams]

And while you are sitting indoors
waiting for the storm to pass
I will be outside dancing in the rain

❧

The weather changed daily from the sun shining brightly in your face to the rain touching your body until the cold would take over. Most of the time Josie loved rain and would happily dance in it but she had homework, lots of homework and truly did not feel like going out.

She told her friend to meet her at the library but was delayed by her backpack being unstrapped and falling to the ground. There was a high pitched squeal coming from the blonde's lips as she watched her items fall out of her backpack.

Almost instantly she fell to her knees and tried to collect her things. "No no please don't be broken." there was panic in her voice as she grabbed for a small black box with her grandmother's present in it. Josie looked up to see who it was that made her backpack fall with her brows forming a frown.

"Why do you hate me so much?"

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[venus ollivander]

"Because you're here." it was the most honest answer V could manage. Venus didn't hate the girl but that was why she victimised her. She enjoyed it, if only because it actually dew a conversation out of the other woman, in a way that she wouldn't be judged for. Venus looked at her crush. She wanted to help but she didn't have the courage for that. that would be openly declaring her affection, which was worse than being hated. She gave a snide-sounding half laugh as the girl struggled with her potentially broken belongings. When she saw the jewellery box, Venus thought maybe she had gone too far, but there could be no apology, A flicker of sympathy crossed her face but instead she chided. "Surely you can do a simple little repairing charm, Williams?" It sounded like mockery, and maybe it was, but it was a suggestion in disguise too.

Venus studied the others' emotion. She felt closer to her, knowing that she had caused her to feel. There was something about this that was almost intimate to the bully. At least it was just between the two of them, which wasn't quite how it usually played out. There were no girls laughing or mocking the Ravenclaw now. Honestly there was a strength in Josie that Venus liked to see. She was encouraging the other to bring it out. She knew this was a problem - but no worse than what she'd face if she were honest and kind to the lesbian woman before her. That was another point. What gave her the right to be open and proud while Venus was so repressed?

The redhead was curious. "Accio box." She declared drawing the item the girl seemed most curious about toward her, catching it in one hand.

[josie williams]

And while you are sitting indoors
waiting for the storm to pass
I will be outside dancing in the rain

❧

The value of jewelry can be very much underestimated. People often go for the money value when in reality it doesn't matter. The value of the heart matters and the young girl had made a necklace with silver and glass stones for her grandmother.

Josie got on her feet after she fixed her backpack and was about to check on the box when Venus spoke. "If my existence bothers you file a complaint with my family." a slight sense of annoyance in her voice as she spoke.

"Because i made it without magic in the first place Ollivander." Josie held onto the box but it was pulled out of her hand by Venus's spell.

"That's not yours!"

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[venus ollivander]

"It's a little late to complain to them now, isn't it? I'll stick with my methods." Venus said trying to sound nasty.

Venus opened the box in her hand, ignoring the protests of its owner, regarding it with some interest. Had she really made this? Without magic? venus didn't understand why you'd want to engage in muggle craftsmanship... She supposed there was something sweet about working with your hands though about intimately building something for a loved one. Even the bully was slightly relieved to see that the gift hadn't broken. She wanted to torment this girl - mostly to see how she would handle it, and to have excuses to speak with her. She didn't want to ruin Josie's life, not that she understood the consequences of bullying and the long lasting harm she quite possibly was doing.

She closed up the box and offered it back to Josie. She wasn't going to try and keep it, or break it. She just wanted to see what it was. If she had been around her posse she would have ended up wearing it, and walking away, but that was with a gang to back her up, and spur her on. By herself, she was a little more candid, a little more able to show what she actually felt. Not a lot more though. It just meant that Cam would be victim of a few less minor acts of spite. Venus honestly, dearly wanted to abandon the pretence all together... But rejection was a possibility and that was something she wasn't prepared to face. "Here." She said coldly, trying to sound disinterested in the item she stole, best not to display other emotions.

[josie williams]

And while you are sitting indoors
waiting for the storm to pass
I will be outside dancing in the rain

❧

Josie refused to let a bully ruin whatever she had in her. The girl believed there was good in Venus but sometimes it was hard to find when Venus pulled mean pranks on her in front of her friends. Josie had offered many times to help Venus find better people who she doesn't have to be mean around but it never seemed to help.

The blonde fought back tears and headed towards her to get the box back. "You don't have to be like this you know.. you can be better than this." she said and took the box from the redhead. She was beautiful and smart and Josie just knew there had to be more in her than this.

"I know it."

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[venus ollivander]

"You don't understand." Venus told her. For a moment the sadness was visible in her face. She couldn't hide it. Venus knew that Josie was gay but the other wouldn't want someone like her. Not a Slytherin, not a popular pureblood girl. Josie wanted someone like Josie, she told herself. She handed over the box willingly and stood for a moment unsure what to do. She looked Josie over and saw that the other was close to tears, That prompted Venus herself to close her eyes and look slightly off to the side. She wanted to hug Josie, almost as much as she wanted to yell, and maybe even a little more than she wanted to run, but she fought the urge.

"You don't know me, Williams. But guess what. I don't get to be nobody, like you. I don't get to just be happy being gay." She said bluntly turning slowly to leave. Maybe Josie was right and she was better than this, but she'd made her bed now. How was she ever meant to make it up to Josie. How was she going to make it through the rest of her school life without keeping on going with this. All of her friends were the same nasty, manipulative sorts of people she was. Many of them were just as cruel, and only a small handful had a conscience. The frustrated redhead turned in a swish of hair, and began to stalk away. Almost hoping that Josie would say something more, would push.Venus wished Josie was right about her.

Then it hit her. Had she just admitted her sexuality to the other?

[josie williams]

And while you are sitting indoors
waiting for the storm to pass
I will be outside dancing in the rain

❧

Venus was strange, beautiful but strange. She never understood why the girl hated her so much and why she enjoyed making her life hell in front of her friends. She just watched her be rude and tell Josie off but the girl didn't buy it. She felt like she hit a nerve there.

"Wait what?" she did hear that right didn't she? Venus was being gay and miserable? Josie headed after her, her hand reaching for Venus's arm. "Hey hold up, what are you saying?" she asked with a curiosity in her voice that was never there before.

"You're miserable and want to be like me?"

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[venus ollivander]

As Venus walked away she felt like she was walking away from a future, maybe. Or what could have been her future if she had found a way to act on her ambition of being around this girl in some other way. She reflected on why she liked Josie. The confidence, the open-ness. The fact that Josie could be herself and be happy. The fact that she always found the good in people. Venus wasn't evil but she didn't know how to handle things, and she was far too concerned with what the nastiest members of hr house thought of her. Her father hadn't approved when she started acting like a blood purist, and he wouldn't have approved of this either, but he wasn't one of her peers. What mattered was what the people in the halls thought about her. Not even her own comfort and happiness could be more important than that, or she was doomed.

She heard the other try to call her back and half considered turning back. She wanted to say something more, but she knew she couldn't. As she heard the other running up behind her she reached again for her wand. As Josie grabbed her arm, Venus bought her wand up under the blonde's chin with every intention to hex her, she looked her dead in the face for a moment, but the compassion the other was showing her was disarming. What was Venus meant to do in a moment like this. Cruel as she was she didn't have a heart of ice, or stone.

"I..." She couldn't do it. The words wouldn't come, either to deny Josie's suspicion, or support it, she couldn't even manage the incantation for a hex. She was lost for words, slowly her wand lowered away from Josie, and she tried to pull free. In this moment she loved and hated and admired this girl in equal measure. why wasn't this young lady in gryffindor? She had a kind of bravery that Venus had never seen before and would probably never see again in anyone else. Venus  felt a rush of jealousy. She wanted to be with Josie, but she wished deep down that she could be like Josie too.

[josie williams]

And while you are sitting indoors
waiting for the storm to pass
I will be outside dancing in the rain

❧

Josie seriously would never understand bullies and their behavior. Venus seemed like she wanted something but the moment she got confronted about it the world was ending and Josie was to blame. Josie was in general a sweetheart but when women become annoying to her in a way she can't stand she would do something.

"What the.." she felt the tip of a wand poking her skin under her chin, fear now in her eyes as she stared at Venus. What was her problem? Was she really going to hex her right in her face?

"Okay fine I'll back off." she said and raised her hands in surrender. "Fine don't tell me.. jeez. I have a date to prepare for anyway so I'll leave you be." she sighed and stepped away.

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[venus ollivander]

"Fine." She said taking a stumbling step toward her long-time victim. Venus didn't really know what she was doing just now. In fact she was almost certainly going to regret it. "Fine." She repeated hesitantly. "I'll tell you but not here. Please..." she pleaded, desperate to finally get it off her chest. Venus began to walk just hoping that Josie would follow her away from the crowds of students, She made her way half way up a flight of stairs where she would see and hear anyone who might intrude on their moment coming from a long way away. She was nervous as she turned watching her Crush, almost in tears now. She sniffed about to break down. Finally she sat down on the steps.

"I'm gay, and I'm miserable." She admitted. "It's all so much pressure, trying to keep my father happy, and be a rolemodel for my brothers, and keep a reputation..." Finally the tears started to fall as she realised she was trying to justify years of abuse and horrible behaviour toward the other girl. "I've liked you since I met you... That's why I bullied you Josie. Because it was a way to be around you without being seen as a loser, or laughed at for being gay. I knew I was hurting you but I did it because how else was I ever going to have something like that?" She asked rhetorically and at this point she just let out a choked noise, crying. Her notions of keeping an eye out for prying students abandoned as she broke down.

Venus expected Josie to laugh at her. to mock her. She didn't understand kindness yet, or kind people in general, and she didn't believe that Josie could accept this after all of the abuse. Even though she had tried. Venus long red hair hung over her face as she looked at Josie, bracing herself for what was about to come.

[josie williams]

And while you are sitting indoors
waiting for the storm to pass
I will be outside dancing in the rain

❧

Josie hated how women could confuse the shit out of her. Josie wanted to walk away, she was done with trying to help her but then Venus told her she was going to tell her whats going on and stupid as Josie was she followed her. 

The girl hummed and listened to Venus with a raised eyebrow. "You have a funny way of showing it.." she mumbled and cocked her head to the side a bit. 

"Listen being gay is nothing to be ashamed of, if people judge its simple jealousy they don't want to express in any other way." she sighed and sat down beside her. 

"If you just told me this would have been a lot easier."

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[venus ollivander]

Venus sighed. She knew that everything Josie was saying was true. she'd known it for a while but she was too vain to really show it. She had literally bullied for the exact reasons that Josie had said people bullied, She'd made Josie's life hell because she was too proud to speak up about who she was, and her interest in a muggleborn girl had made it easy to target Josey, and interact with her that way. If Venus could take it all back... Well usually she wouldn't dream of it, but in this moment it seemed awfully tempting to put it behind her. She wanted to be less awful. The Slytherin in her wanted to take this as a challenge, and make finding happiness as a gay woman a dear ambition... But the Slytherin in her was equally concerned with social status. Venus was vain. If she was going to participate in the food chainshe'd be the apex predator... Or at least that's how she'd though up until this point.

"You don't know what it's like as a pureblood." she professed. "There's so much pressure to be what your family wants you don't always have time for yourself. There's family professions there.s arranged marriages and heirs and all sorts of things. I've never cared for it, but you don't just opt out." She tried to explain but she knew it was useless as another bout of crying came over her. "All those times you said I was better, do you still believe it? Could I just opt out and still be happy?" She pushed She wanted to hear this from Josie. Would someone else make her life miserable like she'd done to Josie? Would things be different for her? Her family, herself included had never truly believed in blood purity as a notion as far as she knew. But, the fact of the matter was that the Slytherin girls she made her company with did ccare. They hated muggleborns, and so Venus had to as well. Now she could see her old friends turning on her.

"I should have just said something. I'm sorry, Josie." She said slowly. sniffling. What had pushed her over the edge, gotten her to crack was the idea of Josie with some other girl, happy while Venus sat alone or with her nasty, cruel friends. Venus had been with those people more because they were her way of achieving popularity rather than spending time with people she actually wanted to associate with.

Venus turned and considered Josie, pushing her now slightly wet red hair from her eyes What a beautiful, kind girl she had spent the last couple ofyears mocking. The Ravenclaw had been willing to forgive her all this time, doe all these things she'd done. She'd come and sit with her, even after the threat ofa curse. She was an amazing person and venus felt herself breaking in a small way. Her biases didn't hold up well to tthis. Her pride was losing its luster.

Venus didn't think twice. She moved in for a kiss. She never expected it to make contact, but it felt right in the heat of the moment. Maybe this would be a less "funny" way of showing her affection.

[josie williams]

And while you are sitting indoors
waiting for the storm to pass
I will be outside dancing in the rain

❧

Josie would never let someone suffer alone. She knew that purebloods were meant to have some sort of status but it was quite strange. The girl knew Venus probably had been suffering under pressure of high expectations but Josie did not want to be the victim of her out lashing behavior. 

"That sounds horrid. Who would want a life like that?" she asked and took Venus's hand in her own in an attempt to comfort her. "Would you like to spend time with my family? They're all friendly caring people." she said and would probably have to warn her brother. 

"I still believe so yes." Josie would never stop believing that being herself would not make her happy. Josie could call the date off, she didn't like the girl as much anyway. She just didn't think the girl she liked would be so mean and now a crying mess. 

Before she knew it Venus leaned in to kiss her and she just quickly leaned forward to kiss her back. She didn't know if it was a smart idea but she did it anyway.

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[venus ollivander]

Venus hand moved to the other girl's shoulder and suddenly none of it mattered. For just a moment she wasn't a pureblood. Josie wasn't a mudblood. They weren't bully and victim. They were kissing. The world and the context was gone. Venus squeezed the other girl's hand. It was her first kiss. The first time she had ever acted on her desire to kiss anyone. Was it always like this? Did it always make the world stop? Venus pulled away with a sigh as finally she needed to breath. For a long moment she just sat in silence just staring. Did that happen? Did she just force it? Had she hurt Josie again - worse did someone see it?

"I'm sorry." She said quietly, she stood up for a moment, using the handrail to get to her feet. She looked down uncertain as to what was going to happen now, what was her relationship with Josie at this point? Were they friends? Could Josie ever actually care about her after all of this? After everything? She had offered to let Venus stay with her... Her family didn't hate muggleborns, that was her friends. They'd accept her staying with muggles. Slowly she retook her seat and spoke quietly. "You'd really let me stay with you?" She didn't understand why this girl was so generous. What had she done to deserve this kindness? What was Josie getting out of it?

She wanted to ask about the kiss, to talk about it but she didn't quite have the strength to admit the sorts of thoughts she was now going through. Instead, she just watched Josie's movements, her eye,s her expression. She sighed, and looked down, she thought she just might cry again. What was she meant to do? Was she going to just throw her friends away? Was she going to keep bullying Josie? She hated the thought of both. She had never been lonely she'd never wanted for friendship... But on the other hand she'd never really had anyone who wasn't a superficial bitch in her life. Except for her brothers and her father she had known blood purists. she had associated with blood purists How would her having shared this with a mudblood change her life - no. Not a mudblood. This girl's parents were muggles but she wasn't dirty for it. Venus found herself finding her own values, rather than the ones she'd started to believe for the sake of her friends.