Shhh!

[emma young]

Onyx... Or Emma. He had to be Emma for now, until he was ready to deal with the repercussions of telling the truth about himself, made his way into the library. He needed to study, but lately that had been hard. He was hoping that this atmosphere, more remote from his housemates and probably less full of his friends would make a difference - but even now, as he walked, he realised that less distraction just meant he would be more trapped inside his own head.  He made his ungraceful way through the library, eyes scanning for some quiet, unclaimed corner, but he wasn't having a lot of luck.Eventually, however, his eyes fell upon his sister. Harlow. He supposed she'd be better than anyone else, she'd understand if he needed quiet. 

Emma approached his sister - her sister? Emma approached Harlow, sitting across from her. "Hey, sis." He spoke quietly. It seemed that who he wanted to be was winning the battle in his head. "Mind if I have a seat?" Em asked mildly. He was sure Harlow would immediately realise he wasn't happy, they'd grown up together. Honestly he wouldn't be too surprised if Harlow had already guessed something was bothering him. She had seemed off until recently too. Now though, she seemed to be doing better.  "You're looking better." he smiled softly. "Did Emily actually decide to act like a decent human being?" When it had all happened, Emma had punched Emily straight in the face. He didn't know if he'd knocked some sense into her. He wasn't going to tolerate anyone hurting his family.

He just hoped that Harlow would focus enough on her own problems not to worry about his. Though part of him wanted to express himself to her.

[harlow young]

Things had been looking up for Harlow, and everything seemed to be falling into place. With term almost over, she had finally managed to actually come out to some people and was supported. Her parents didn't know just yet, but she planned on telling them when she's home for the summer holidays. There had been a big change in Harlow ever since she and her girlfriend made it a official and every time she saw the girl, she smiled. Every time she thought of Max, she smiled. People had given her weird looks whenever she started to stare at the girl from across the room when they're not physically next to each other. The Hufflepuff chaser had been caught daydreaming the past few days and people had questioned. Perhaps some would say Harlow Ollie Young had it bad, something wouldn't admit easily. 

Of course Harlow was sitting in the library, her eyes staring ahead instead of writing stuff for class, thinking of the very girl that kissed her. The girl that had helped her some to terms with what was happening. It had been hard for the past few weeks, but she was actually happy that she had someone now. Someone she looked forward too. 

The female dropped the quill when she heard Emma come to her table and she smiled a bit at her. Family was something she cared about and ever since the twins died, she looked out for her siblings in school. Even kept an eye on Lucas because Jesse asked her to do so ever since the young boy was sorted into her house. 

"Yeah, no sit down." she said, frowning a bit at the sight of her sister. Something was up, which made her worry. "Yeah, no. I haven't spoken to her ever since she pulled that stunt."

She hated Emily for what she did, but it made her stronger. At least Harlow had someone. "What's up?"

emma young

[emma young]

Emma was struck by that frown. He knew he'd been right. Harlow had known him for his whole life after all. He sat down though, looking a little uncertainly at his older sister. He was glad that she was feeling better and he didn't want to make things worse for her. He hadn't met Max, yet, he didn't know what was making things better for Harlow and he didn't want to ruin it with his own drama and uncertainty. "I'll be fine, Harlow." He told her, a little nervously. It wasn't exactly a lie, but it was pretty obvious that he was dodging answering the question, as his eyes darted away from hers, refusing contact for just a moment.

"What's been happening on your end? I haven't seen you looking this good for a while." He  deflected her concern with a grin, composing himself, looking into her eyes now. He hoped he could keep this to her, and good things, at least until he could explain away his silence with study. In fact he was already unpacking his things to do so. "If it's not her, is there another girl? Or are you just happier not hanging out with such a nasty bitch?" Emma was a little aggressive in his feelings toward Emiliy. He supposed it was worse than if someone had just bullied his sister, or had just rejected her. This was her best friend who had laughed at her, and there was probably nothing Emily could ever do to fix things anymore.

As he felt the thoughts that had bothered him begin to get to him again, he opened his book. "I've got some homework to do - don't hate me if I'm quiet?" he asked gently, frowning.

[harlow young]

Harlow had raised an eyebrow at her sister, knowing there's something off about her mood and she'd push if she had too. Sometimes she'd just stare at her siblings to get them to talk to her, it had worked on her when Sapphire did it a few years back. Of course Harlow was younger then, and now she'd try to adopt that talent even if it failed at times. The females in the Young family were a scary bunch, or so she's been told by Jesse. There were times she'd get what she wanted because she had stared at him for a long while.

"Nothing really." she lied about what was going on her end. Well, she'd tell the truth if she told her what was happening in her life. "You know, I won't talk until you tell me what's going on with you. I've known you all your life, I'm not blind." she pointed as she placed a hand on the table, over the book to get her to focus on her instead of studying.

They had been through a lot, they had lost their sisters in a tragic car accident and haven't been the same since. The thought of the twins being gone was always a sore spot for the family. Once they're brought up, the whole room would go quiet. Harlow wasn't going to let her sister shut her out, no. If there was something bothering her, she'd want to know about it.

[emma young]

There was something about the sort of silence that Harlow wielded that was disarming. Emma sighed and looked up at her. Honestly what else had he been expecting? She told herself that she wouldn't have to talk about this but deep down she wanted to get it off his chest. That was why he had chosen this seat when he saw his sister. The difficulty now was trying to figure out the words. What was he meant to say? He looked at her, silently for a moment. He found himself trying not to cry for a moment feeling tense. Scared. For all the queer members of their family Emma was the only trans person.

As Harlow's hand covered his book, Emma straightened up, sighing heavily. He deflated a bit. What were the words for something like this? Purebloods didn't really deal with trans-ness often. the culture that most purebloods were raised in wasn't on where trans people were really talked about. Emma had no doubt that his family would accept him but would they really understand it?

Emma thought about everything the family had lost, and was overcome with shame at the idea of taking another daughter away from his parents his tears finally did start to fall then, but he didn't look away, he just very meekly, very uncertainly stared at his sister, finally at long last whispering in a tone that suggested that there could be nothing worse than anyone else hearing. "I'm a boy." His voice shook a little as he said it. "I want to be a boy." He still wasn't sure which words were the right ones but... There it was.

[harlow young]

The moment that Emma said those very words, Harlow didn't move and she thought the whole room went silent but then again, it was a library. The room was supposed to be silent. One of the many reasons she was there. But of course, that's besides the point at the very moment. The female knew there was something up with her sister...brother? There was no way Emma wasn't going to leave the library without telling Harlow what was on her, his mind. She had accepted the fact that Emma wasn't the person he was years ago. How long had Emma known this? The questions that flooded her head, but knew she shouldn't ask them.

For a few moments Harlow just sat there, her hand not moving and her eyes on Emma the whole time. There wasn't a smile or an angry look on her face cause she didn't know what to say or do. No, she wasn't angry. She'd never be angry at Emma unless he took something from her.

Harlow's hand reached for Emma's giving her a supporting smile. "Hey, it's okay. I don't love you any less."

[emma young]

"I knew you wouldn't." Onyx said managing a weak smile. "I just... Mum and dad don't need to lose another daughter." He said mournfully. "I don't want to take that away from them, and... How would I even do it?" He asked gently. He didn't really understand what he was going through himself. It was a complicated a thing and he'd been dealing with it a long time. Indeed he'd never quite felt girly. He'd never been really feminine. He'd made peace with that a long time ago, but he thought perhaps he'd just been a tom boy, or a very butchy girl... No. That all felt wrong. Onyx was meant to be a boy... But he was also meant to be a good daughter.

"Can you call me Onyx?" He requested gently. He immediately thought it was stupid. He hoped it didn't come off as mocking the twins, who had been named for gem stones... He wanted to pay tribute to them, not to mock them, but he was still scared. How was it going to come off? "Just when we're alone. I'm not ready to tell people yet." He was scared for a moment that he would have hurt Harlow. The last thing he wanted to was to cause pain for his sister. He loved her more than just about anyone. He squeezed his sister's hand. silently now. What was he meant to say. Finally, after almost a minute he found his words.

"I'm sorry, Harlow." He shook his head slightly.

[harlow young]

Harlow had kept her hand on her brother's, knowing changes were going to happen sooner or later. But she wanted her brother to not feel alone in this, and she wanted to be there every step. "You won't hurt them." she told her newfound brother, shaking her head as she thought over the possible scenarios in her head. No, they would never turn their back on their own child. They were all a family and they stuck together no matter what. Yes, they lost the twins and she understood the fear her brother had, but it needed to be happen or else he'll be miserable for the rest of his life. Harlow wasn't going to let that happen -no way. One way or another, they needed to accept it.

"Onyx it is." she said, smiling a bit as she removed her hand and leaned back in her seat to look at him. "Just between us. I promise. You make me proud, you know that, right? Jade and Sapphire will be happy for you. And I want you to be happy." she said and looked around to make sure no one was near.

"Don't apologize. There's nothing to be sorry for...Onyx." she said softly, leaning forward a bit. "Now, since you told me what's going on with you. I'll be truthful and tell you that I have a girlfriend. And it's not Emily."

[emma young]

Onyx was vigilant at first, looking around the library. He wasn't ready for anyone to know yet, and he was ready to change the subject or even just to run. But then he heard his sister's praise and his attention snapped to her and only her. Jade and Sapphire would be happy? That meant the world to Onyx too. He had always been sure that Harlow would support him. He never really felt there was any doubt there. Still that sort of praise was enough to make him tear up all over again, this time in a positive way. He couldn't stop smiling as he listened to her, and then he heard the good news. Harlow had a girlfriend? That was amazing news!

"Who is she?" He asked brightly, happily. Onyx was a protective soul he'd definitely need to keep an eye on whoever this was but she was making Harlow happy which meant that she'd already won the more important half of the battle. If Harlow was happy then Onyx wasn't going to be throwing any more punches. He looked Harlow over, curiously, a hand running over his sister's, before he stood up.

He made his way around the table to sit beside his sister hugging her. His eyes took Harlow in and he felt nothing but respect and adoration to his sister. What was he meant to say? "I'm happy for you, Har." He told her brightly. His head was swimming a little with everything that was happening but it was a great feeling, almost euphoric. The young transman closed his eyes for a moment as he pressed himself close to his sister, before the question stretched on. 

"Do you think Onyx is a good name? I wanted to use something that could be a tribute to Jade and Sapphire, but, I don't know. Will everyone be okay with it?"

[harlow young]

The Hufflepuff fifth year wasn't going to let the Emily ordeal ruin her life, even if she was still sad about it because those two girls were best friends since they met in first year. They had spent time during the summer holidays at each other's houses and gotten to know the family. People had looked at Emily as if she was was Harlow's sister, and when the feelings started to hit Harlow, she wanted to confess. A mistake, but also she gained something from it. She got Max. Max had helped her and she was thankful.

There was a smile on her face as she watched her brother get up and sat down next to her, and she leaned into the hug. Harlow knew Onyx was someone who'd understand and their family didn't know about it quite yet. "Her name is Max Walker.
In my year and house so we shared a dorm for the past five years." she said with a smile and blush. "We talked about the whole Emily thing. How torn I was over losing the twins two years ago and she...just kissed me. Twice."

The female stared ahead as she started thinking of the other Hufflepuff girl, and smiled a bit at the thought of having someone. It took her a few seconds to snap out of it and looked at Onyx.

"Sounds pretty badass. It's a nice tribute. I don't see why anyone would be against it."

emma young

[emma young]

Onyx admired his sister's strength. If someone had outed Onyx either as bisexual or as trans, it would have broken him - he was nearly ready after this conversation but he needed to do it on his own terms none the lass. Harlow though, she'd weathered this storm and she'd come out of it still strong. Of course he was sure his sister was still hurting. and he didn't regret punishing Emily for what she had done to Harlow.

As the boy heard his sister talk about her new girlfriend he was immediately conflicted. It sounded as though Max had made a move when Harlow was vulnerable, but it sounded like she had good intentions too. He had a hard time figuring out exactly what he felt about this. Onyx decided he'd need to meet this girl before he really passed judgement. But he was a protective soul and his sister meant the world to him. If someone was going to hurt her he was going to have something to say about it. "She kissed you, in that sort of situation? Don't you think you were kind of vulnerable?" Onyx questioned gently, but he kept his face smiling. "I guess as long as you're happy it doesn't matter, but when are you going to introduce me?" He asked curiously

"Thanks." He said in response to her approval of his new choice of name. That made him beam. He loved the name and his sister approved. he was so glad for that. He was hoping she was right and that he would do Jade and Sapphie proud, that his choice to pay tribute to them would actually mean something. He desperately wanted to amount to being someone his sisters would be proud of. "I love you, Harlow." He told her brightly. His sister's love and support meant the world to him. He leaned forward on the table, smiling.

"So tell me more about max?" He asked curiously.

[harlow young]

Vulnerable or not, Harlow wasn't going to regret dating this classmate of hers. It was a pretty new thing, and she wanted to protect her new relationship from the vultures who'd probably try to break it up. Harlow wasn't going to let people talk her down anymore, she was going to stand her ground and ignore everyone's judgmental eyes - even keep the relationship from her other siblings because last thing she wants was for Jordan to scare Max away with her behavior and her parents were going to find out in a letter soon enough. They needed to know about it someway or another.

There was a smile on Harlow's face as she eyed her kid brother, her head shaking and she had to laugh a bit. Of course Onyx wants to be introduced to Max sometime. "If you promise to behave, I'll ask her if she wants to meet you. I'm kinda keeping it on the down low because you know how Jordan is." she gave an annoyed tone at the mention of her sister.

"I love you too."

Harlow bit her cheek as she looked around the library, smiling at the thought of her girlfriend and wanted to go hug her for some reason in that current moment.

"She has these beautiful eyes that I love getting lost in. A beautiful soul if you ask me. She doesn't take anyone's crap. A great kisser." she said and just started to trail off as she started to daydream.

Good job, Onyx.

emma young